Friday, May 22, 2009


39 weeks down and counting. Well, we've reached the point in the pregnancy where I am officially feeling done and ready. I'm due on Wednesday. If I go into labor next week, my doctor is on vacation. If I don't go into labor next week, I get induced on Monday, June 1. Kind of a dilemma. In a perfect world, I would go into labor late next Sunday night (the 31) and have my doctor deliver on Monday morning. But, this girl is going to come when she wants to, or by the 1st if she doesn't feel like it, so we'll just have to wait and see. In the meantime, I'm swollen and getting tired of wearing flip flops because they are the only shoe that has fit for the past two months. I'm also pretty tired, but not tired enough to be asleep at 5 am. I've just been waking up and staring at the windows and trying to think of something to bake that would motivate me to get up and moving at such an hour. So far, nothing has been calling out to me that much.

Yesterday J and I were at the grocery store. He was disappointed by the lack of samples, so he said, "Mommy, since there are no samples, we need to get some donuts." I didn't even hesitate to tell him he was right and we filled our little bag of sugar. Only one more week, so why stop now, right?

Anyway, just thought I'd let you know we're all just hanging out here waiting. If anyone knows any good baby chants, share them with me, please.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Kind of Missing the Point

Last week, J did a horrible thing at Walgreens. Actually, he did two horrible things. While playing with a large bottle of antibacterial soap while I was paying for something at the register, he headed for the door. Upon realization that the door magically opened by itself, he took the opportunity to perform his first act of shoplifting and bolted outside. I freaked. He laughed. Laughed as I called for him to come back. Laughed as I sprinted after him like a gazelle that was not pregnant (or maybe it was a hippo?). I grabbed a hold of him for a second, but he was too quick for me, for he just dropped his unpaid merchandise and kept on running.

This was no longer humorous, not that it really was to me, but I was seriously worried that he was going to leap out into the parking lot and get hit by a car. Cars were stopping in the parking lot because they saw this crazy boy with his unfit mother sprinting after him. I finally caught him as he rounded the corner of the building. His response? "You're hurting my arm!" I felt like the sterotypical parent, thinking, "I could be hurting more than your arm" and "Just wait until your father hears about this (only the father was on a plane to Florida for a conference)." I retrieved the bottle of soap and quickly placed it back inside the store. What did I see when I did that? About ten people with their eyes fixed on me and their jaws stuck open. I can only imagine what they were thinking.

This little escapade left me unable to walk for the rest of the day. Clearly full-term pregnant ladies are not supposed to test their agility and swiftness at this point in time, and I was paying for using my animal instincts.

The best part? J didn't want to apologize. I let him sit in his room for close to 45 minutes "to think about what he did" while I took a shower and composed myself. He finally got lonely and caved. We talked about how people who take things they don't pay for go to jail. We talked about how he could have been hurt. Then he asked if he could eat lunch. The three year old mind can only process so much.

This isn't the first time I have had to deal with a laughing J running away from me, but it was the first time I had to deal with it in a store. I realized this would be no easier for me when I have a newborn in a sling and I am at the cash register, so I folded. I bought my kid a leash. I can hear all of you gasping. I'll give you a moment...

Now before you all go judgmental on me, I did not opt for one of those harness ones, or even worse, one of those teddy bear or elmo backpacks, although looking back on it, I totally missed an opportunity since my kid is petrified of teddy bears and that would have taught him a lesson pronto. I chose one that attaches to the wrist with super-duper velcro and stretches so that he can still move. What did J say when his dad told him what it was? "Oh goody, I can take Mommy for a walk." Hmmm...

We had to "practice" using our little leash around the house the other day. Then we had to play puppy with it. This was so not the point, but I figured he wouldn't be too keen on using it in public. Not so! I had to make a trip inside the post office today and I brought it along with me. I asked J if he could behave without it. He told me, "I want to use it. I want you to walk me." In fact, he practically had a tantrum because I was considering not using it. Honestly, I don't want the stares any more than the next mom, but I was stuck.

Off we went into the post office. My little puppy and I waited in line. Apparently I am not allowed to put the leash on my wrist as directed because that is "doing it wrong." We almost had a melt down about that. All in all, it kept him close and happy at the same time. Who knew?

J refused to take it off as we left the store. I had to walk him to the car. And just like a puppy, he stopped every so often so I would have to pull him. Once again, the three year old found a way to beat the parent. Who knows what could come next.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Probably a Fluke, but...

J was watching Super Why while I was taking a shower. Wonder Red was using -at words to try to fit the story. The first was cat. Then she said, "Let's change the first letter." And J said, "Bat!" before the tv kids answered. I was pretty surprised. So I did what every reading teacher/mother does in times like these-- I quizzed my child.

I wrote down cat on a piece of paper and asked him what it said. He told me. Next I wrote down bat. No problem. Fat. Hat. Sat. Pat. Mat. The last one took a few seconds.

How cool is that?

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

J's Thoughts

"Did you know that a chrysalis is sometimes called a pupa? That's a funny word. Pupa." Okay, I think we can upgrade the second grade science curriculum in schools if my kid is learning about it in his 3 year old class.

"I hope we practice our letter M today. Worksheets are the best." Oh no! Say it isn't so!

"Heh, heh, heh. The baby will be swaddled. Swaddled, swaddled, swaddled. That's so funny. A swaddle is like a baby enchilada wrapped up like a burrito."

"If I am a good boy, I can have an icicle pop. Maybe even two. If I am not a good boy...sigh, I can forget about it."

"Fire ants are mean. They bit that boy. I will stay away from the fire ants and if they come near me, I will say, 'Get out of here fire ants and go bite something else because you are not nice.'"

"Why does Daddy have another meeting? I'm all meetinged out." Me, too!

I had to ask J to repeat this one because I had to write it all down.
"Bubbles and toots make something out of air. They are the same because they come out of your bottom. I'm tooting right now and that's what I did. I made some air. It's called a toot. Did you know that?"

Saturday, May 02, 2009

I'll Tell You if You Have the Swine Flu!

I promised you pictures. B is away in Florida at his annual endo conference. I'll just say that J and I have had an interesting few days. Stories to follow at some point when I am still not fuming from them. Yes, there is now more than one story.

Ready for the patient

Heartbeat sounds good, Mom!

J talks to his sister-- your one and only bare belly shot on this blog.

J and R in similar Easter duds

My bunny cake. I totally understand why Mom always put coconut on the Easter lamb cake! What you can't see are the little black and brown jelly beans in the grass at the back of the bunny. B begged me to put them there. It's the little things that make him happy.

My friends threw me a delightful little shower a few weeks ago. D knitted this adorable burp cloth, sweater, and cupcake hat. I can't wait to use all of them!

Everyone contributed to a "words to live by" tree that will hang in the girl's room.

I asked K to paint some dragonflies in the bedroom, but she painted me some fantastic ones on canvas instead. They are perfect. If you look in between the crib slats, you can see the chair rail and purple paint we chose. I'll take a picture when everything is up and organized in the room.