Kid Speak

I know I've been posting a lot about all of the neat things that J says, but it just keeps getting better. For example:

Me: Do you want a red balloon or a blue balloon?
J: Blue balloon. NOT red balloon.
Of course. Not the red balloon.
These statements are so funny because they happen so often now. If I ask him what he wants for lunch, he says, "Not sweet potatoes" and things like that.

We are taking care of our neighbor's dog this week. We take Hunter walking on a greenbelt not too far from our house. I walk with J in the backpack.

Me: Okay, we are going to go to the greenbelt now that we have Hunter on his leash.
J: Mommy, J, Hunter go seatbelts.
Me: No, not seatbelts. We use seatbelts in the car. This is the greenbelt. We walk here.
J: Seatbelt car. Walk Greenbelt Hunter seatbelt.

On the way to our gym there are a bunch of office buildings. Each of the buildings has a letter in a top corner. J recognizes the H and the Z. The building with the Z is called Zimmer.
J: Hello H. Bye Bye H. Hello Z! Zimmer! (It's as if they're old friends when he says this) Bye Bye Z Zimmer. Zimmer again soon. Turn around. See Zimmer again.
It pains him to leave the Zimmer building.

On the way home from the gym...
J: Mommy fat chicken.
Me: What?
J: Mommy fat chicken.

I am dumbfounded by this one. I can't translate this into anything without digging myself into a hole. Does my son think I'm fat? A fat chicken? Why would he think I am a fat chicken?
We've never talked about things being fat. Where would he come up with a fat chicken?

When we were back at the neighbor's house and were walking out of their yard, J spotted something and said, "There. fat chicken mommy." Sure enough there was a large ceramic hen in one of the garden beds. Phew. Okay. That makes sense now. I'm glad I'm not the fat chicken after all.